40 Question Meme for Fanfic Writers #6-10

Questions taken from AO3 Comment of the Day.

6. Share one of your weaknesses.

My absolute worst weakness as a writer is that I tend not to fit enough writing time in around my work and family time. This leads to sporadic output and also plays havoc with my ability to finish longer works. It’s also one that has plagued me ever since I got serious about my writing, which was over twenty years ago. I’ve found that accountability and celebration of small victories are the best ways to keep myself motivated to keep my “butt in the seat,” but I have yet to figure out the best way to go about managing those. Still, it’s a start, and my output pace is slowly improving.

In terms of writing itself, I can’t decide if my worst weakness is my tendency to overuse certain words and phrases, or plotting itself. The first is easily handled with a good set of beta readers, but I’d like to get to the point that I don’t inflict that weakness on them, either. The second, though, has proven far more elusive. For a long time I simply didn’t know how to do it; Freytag’s pyramid might work for literary analysis, but it doesn’t work for me at all when it comes to execution.

I wasn’t really able to get my arms around plotting until I discovered the Save the Cat Beat Map, but even that doesn’t quite work for me as-is. I’ve since developed an eight-point map/question series that I use for high-level plotting. For short stories, that’s enough; but for longer stories I’ll then split the eight points into four points each to create a total of thirty-two plot points. This helps me find places where what I might think of as a plot point turns out to be a simple event. It also, once completed, gives me a fairly comprehensive outline.

I’m still refining my plotting methods, and I still don’t feel like I have much strength in the area, but at this point I’ve at least gotten to where I don’t crash and burn after the first chapter. That is definitely progress, and I intend to keep trying.

I have some other, smaller weaknesses as well. I stay aware of them, and that’s usually sufficient to keep me on track when drafting.

7. Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

This piece is from my Castle story, “Touch of Grey.”

The heat, the rain. The sound of the storm, and the sweat of a fever. The shock and burn from a bullet wound.

It’d been so hot. So terribly, terribly hot.

Castle sighs again, letting his head fall back against the wall. So this is what PTSD feels like.

I myself have complex PTSD, thanks to childhood events, and one of the hardest things for me to explain to others is that, when I’m having a panic attack, I usually know I’m having it. So do many PTSD sufferers. The difference between PTSD sufferers and non-sufferers isn’t that we think or behave in irrational ways when we’re upset. Everyone does that. It’s that we can become so overwhelmed that we literally cannot pull ourselves back to a rational state on our own. A significant portion of treatment for the condition involves re-training our ingrained behaviors and reactions so that we can.

When I’m in the middle of an attack, my thoughts really do become a disjointed, non-sensical jumble of images; and after I’ve managed to come out of it, I’m always tired. It doesn’t matter how much rest I might have gotten the night before. The rush of hormones (primarily adrenaline and cortisol) wears me out as it fades. I’m also usually embarrassed about the loss of control, and I just want to stop thinking about or doing anything while I finish recovering from the physical reactions. This passage, which practically wrote itself, captures that point in a way I’ve never been able to explain just by using words.

I have had several people, both in posted reviews and in private messages, tell me that they feel the same way, including the profound exhaustion — both mental and physical — that I depict here.

8. Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

This is from my Star Trek: Voyager story, “First Kiss,” and depicts a conversation between Seven of Nine and the Doctor.

“You’re staring, Seven. That usually isn’t considered polite.”

“They are making a very inappropriate display of public affection,” she announced. Her voice was uneven.

“Yes, they are. But it still isn’t polite to stare. Come on. I’ll get you to sickbay.”

“I do not require medical assistance at this time.”

“You’ve been drinking champagne again,” he replied. “Don’t you remember what happened the last time you did that?”

She gave him a cool look. “That was an aberration. I do not usually succumb to the deleterious effects of alcohol.”

He sighed. “There are many documented cases of humans reacting more quickly to champagne than to other alcoholic beverages. You appear to be one of them. Now, come on.” He was keeping his voice low, hoping to avoid a scene.

“I do not wish to comply.”

“Sev-en.” He emphasized each syllable. “I don’t have my med kit with me, but I could ask Ensign Vorik to nerve-pinch you and beam you to sickbay.” That earned him a shocked look. “I’d really rather not cause you any embarrassment, though.”

Her expression had become haughty, with no small amount of hostility mixed in. “Very well. I will comply, but only to avoid causing a spectacle. I am not intoxicated.”

9. Which fic has been the hardest to write?

In terms of finished fics, my Castle piece, “Family Secrets” (currently down for a complete overhaul), was the hardest to write. It was also, to date, the longest piece I’ve finished. Reader reaction was mixed, as it broke one of the cardinal rules of fan fiction: the main character wasn’t a canonical character from the show (although the plot events reflected canonical occurrences). But it’s also one of the pieces that I’m most proud of writing, because I actually managed to stay on a schedule and get it posted in something resembling a normal time frame.

My Star Trek: Discovery piece, “Mind Over Matter,” was one of the most technically difficult to write, as I’d never written action or battle scenes before. I have fond memories of a night at Sweet Hut in Duluth, Georgia, where some friends and I modeled ship movements using condiment packets and silverware (thoroughly confusing other patrons in the process). That exercise taught me a lot and greatly increased my comfort with such scenes.

I’ve put a lot of effort into “Standing in the Dark,” which is the piece I’m working on as I post this. It’s a rewrite of my Scarecrow and Mrs. King fic, “The Energy of Sun Rays,” except that I’m doing it right this time. Between the two pieces, I’ve already written 50K+ words, and I’m expecting to add at least 50K more before it’s done. I also had to do multiple rewrites on a piece that’s going to appear in a fanzine later this month, called “Filling the Silence.” (It’s also in the Scarecrow and Mrs. King fandom.) That one is also one of the most intensely personal fics I’ve written, and I’m very happy with the end result.

10. Which fic has been the easiest to write?

One of the easiest to write was my one and only Battlestar Galactica fic, “This Much, I Can Give.” The inspiration for the first vignette came from a piece of fan art depicting Roslin and Adama huddling together for warmth while spending the night on Kobol. It was a cute piece of art, but the idea of it being Roslin and Zarek leapt into my mind on seeing it. (I’d long since noticed the almost courtly way he treats her.) The rest of the fic practically wrote itself.

I also had a lot of fun with my Star Trek: Discovery fic, “Comfort Food.” That was inspired by real-life events involving food poisoning and Team Basement’s approach to humor.

My Star Trek: Voyager fic, “Vulnerability” (adult-rated, and also currently down for an overhaul), was also easy to write as it’s an admitted rip-off of a M*A*S*H episode. I wrote that fic specifically in response to another writer accusing me of wanting to “only write fairy tales” when I commented that I saw no point to writing explicit scenes that had nothing to do with advancing the plot, and wishing other writers would do the same; at the time there was a specific pairing I wanted to read, but couldn’t, because I couldn’t find non-explicit fics about it.